Thursday, February 23, 2012

Oh, the screeching

Does anyone have any idea what's going on with the Wee One?

I think he might be a werewolf.

Or something.

Though Charlaine Harris tells me those pesky werewolf symptoms don't manifest until adolescence.


Ow-Woooooo

Seriously though, he's bad. 


Super bad.

This child is hitting the terrible two's with such force and vehemence that I am going to the library  to obtain some advice on child rearing.

Our conversation every stinkin' morning: 
Him: "Kin I have a pancake?"
Me: "Sure Bud" (I head to the microwave, beeping ensues)
Me: (Approaching were-child with pancake) "Do you want me to cut it up? Or do you want it big?"
Him: "I want it in pieces!"
Me: "You want me to cut it up?"
Him: "Yes!"
Me: "You don't want it big?" (I know where this is headed, but I try, oh do I try, to avoid to inevitable)
Him: "No!"
Me: (Placing the knife on the pancake) "You want me to cut it?"
Him: "Yes!"
Me: (Resigned sigh. I cut the pancake and walk away)
Him: WAAAAH! I WANTED IT BIG!" WAHH!"

He throws.

He hits.

He is not at all intimidated by me.

He has two volume settings: whining and screeching.

He is a tough fellow to live with.

He is full of such angst. The mere inadvertent knocking over of a block tower causes a deluge of rage and violence.

He's clumsy and reckless. Always traveling at a full run unless I'm in a hurry and then the word dawdle doesn't even begin to describe his behavior.

He's also clingy - stalking me like an irritating heat seeking missile.
"Kin I sit in your lap?"
"Kin you pick me up?"
"Mama? Wheah ah yooo?"

Help?

6 comments:

  1. Hey babe - you need an anti-toddler cloaking device, or at least a flare countermeasure system to throw him off the trail when he's in pursuit. :-) Happy Thursday

    ReplyDelete
  2. My 2.5 year old is also in the annoying stage. Never to his face, but sometimes I secretly call him my little gnat because he bugs me! This stage is hard- the good news is that it doesn't last forever.

    Lately, I've been making solo runs to Target or the grocery store after Hubby gets home. It really helps with the whole sanity thing, heehee.

    ReplyDelete
  3. oh boy i wish i could take him for a day..i remember a little girl that was exactly like him he he..this stage will pass too..give him kisses from nana..

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sounds like the morning we had at our house ... except instead of whole waffle versus cut up waffle, our battle royale was about pink bowl versus purple bowl. Seriously!?!? Needless to say, a tantrum ensued and there was no breakfast to be had. Which, as you know, means low blood sugar ... which leads to more undesirable behavior ... and so on.

    (And she wonders why I wasn't in the mood to sing along to princess tunes on the way to school!)

    Hang in there. Mama said there would be days like this, right?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Haha Melissa! I feel for you! My four year old was the same EXACT way... unfortunately it doesn't go away completely for awhile... well we are at 4 1/2, and while his is much better he still has his moments. The days when he actually says "I don't care which cup you give me" is the happiest moment ever!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I just bumped into a book at amazon called "The Explosive Child" about kids w/low frustration tolerance. Would that help?

    ReplyDelete