Thursday, March 10, 2011

A Break

Two mornings this week the boys will be heading to the home of a beloved friend/child-care provider. No, I will not give you her name and phone number, she's mine.

I need a break.

I need a few hours alone in my home.

I'm beginning to feel overwhelmed by the piles of out-of-size and out-of-season clothes, the too-small cloth diapers overflowing from a bin, the unwashed baseboards and walls sticky with fingerprints.



It has taken me far too long to admit that I need a break.

I feel as if I shouldn't need a break. These are my children and I am lucky to be able to spend these short years home with them basically full-time.



I should cherish these moments because they are short.

I will yearn for them the moment they are gone.

And yet, I drop them off anyway, run to my car - giddy and guilty when faced with the idea of a few hours alone.

I drive around without the radio on. I love the silence.

I eat lunch sitting at the table. I love sitting.

I tidy up and then it's time to go get them.

I barely got anything accomplished, and I am disappointed. It will take some practice - this taking a break thing, but I don't mind.  All great things take practice.

6 comments:

  1. why the guilt? you work full time and if you were working outside of the house ,you would get two breaks and a lunch hour so go and enjoy GUILT FREE you dummy!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. breaks are allowed - even lazy ones.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Go for it - believe me, I'm already counting the seconds until my wee boy starts nursery school in September and I'll get 2 whole hours to myself, 3 times a week. Enjoy those breaks, ditch the guilt! x

    ReplyDelete
  4. It wouldn't be much of a break if you didn't REST while you were having it! Everyone needs a break!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Having time to yourself is an accomplishment all on its own--don't feel guilty about it! Enjoy your break time!

    ReplyDelete