***
Number of times I have fallen off a rolling stool at work: 2.
Once as I scooted towards a patient, into whom I was about to stick a needle. She was certainly confident in my nursing skill after that, right?
Once as I scooted towards my boss who was seated nearby.
***
Then there was the time I set the oven on fire while making a birthday dinner for beloved Hubs. Here's an important piece of information for all you guys - if you're making oven fries - be sure to use a sheet pan with a lip, otherwise the oil will drip of your fancy edgeless sheet pan and onto the heating element. This causes fire. Yes, the firemen came. Happy Birthday.
***
One time I drove off with a significantly large portion of leftover birthday cake on the roof of my car.
***
Yes it is true that I attempted to back out of the garage with the tailgate of my wagon open - twice. Finally succeeded in breaking the pneumatic hinge on the second try. Now I have several helpful reminders to close the tailgate before attempting to leave the garage.
 |
| It's awesome to be me. |
***
Then there was the time that I hit myself in the face. With a wrench. At work. Awesome conversation with my boss went like this,
"Hey Melis- Woah, what happened to you?"
"Yeah. I umm. Hit myself. In the face. With a wrench."
Then I had to repeat the whole story to someone in HR so we could fill out an incident report.
"So the injury was ... umm... that you..."
"Hit myself in the face. With a wrench."
***
Please, make me feel less lame and share your embarrassingly awesome moment. I'd love to hear it.
You have made my day! :)
ReplyDeletenow that made me smile.
ReplyDeletetoo many to count in my many years on this earth. at least you live with a kind gentleman..imagine how thoughtful and forgiving your dad is when i set fire to the oven..made me laugh you are quite a bungle my darling!!!
ReplyDeletethanks guys - I'm happy to share my awesomeness :)
ReplyDeleteI broke my MIL's pyrex dish by cooking with it on her ceramic stove - lemon pie goop explosion. Still living that one down.
ReplyDeleteMM - That's awesome! A friend of mine just made her blender explode - pureeing hot soup - you are not alone - kitchen explosions are awesome (as long as there are no injuries!)
ReplyDeleteI thought you were supposed to be able to puree hot soup in a blender- don't lots of recipes tell you to do that?!
ReplyDeleteMy worst: practically totaling our new car lease by looking out my side window (at something apparently interesting) whilst driving at 30 miles an hour... into the rear of the car in front of me.
...I'd always wondered what it would be like to make use of an airbag...
R&T - yes you can use the blender but you have to go in really small batches (like 1 cup at a time) if you do too much at once, you'll crack the glass.
ReplyDeleteYikes - I've always wondered the airbag thing too... glad you're okay
Hmmm...on my third date with my husband, after a couple glasses of wine I went to use the ladies room, and couldn't find my way back to our table. I kept walking around praying he didn't see what an idiot I looked like trying to find him. Luckily, he didn't (you know how guys are).
ReplyDeleteAnd that blender was only used once before. It was new!!!
ReplyDeleteHey, I set the oven on fire 4 times growing up. Each time it was for the same dish.
OK. Game on. I slammed my forehead into a grocery shopping cart handle while bending forward to laugh harder. SMASH! People definitely looked.
ReplyDeleteTwice while climbing two different short, steep hills decades apart, I slammed the top of my head full force (1) into a highway guardrail (don't ask) and (2) a horizontal chain link fence post - there was no chain link below it to provide me that all important hint of danger.
There are many, many more. My favorites are the ones that occur immediately after I've made some stupid arrogant statement about my wonderfulness.